-No catchers. After a pitcher makes a pitch he has to quickly
run to the backstop and retrieve the bouncing ball.
-No in-game pitching changes, no in-season roster moves, and
no disabled lists. Did your pitcher just have Tommy John surgery a week ago?
Too bad—play ball!
-Lower the mound to the point where it’s a 4-foot ditch
under the rest of the playing field. (The
pitcher would have to pitch the ball as if he's lobbing a hand grenade.)
-No force outs. Only tag outs.
-Shrink the strike zone to: bottom of batter's crotch to top
of batter's crotch.
-Bats are filled with explosives. A well-struck ball causes
the bat to immediately ignite into mini fireworks. (This will not increase offense per se, but it would be cool.)
-Legalize steroids for positions players only.
-Foul balls that make it to the upper deck are automatic
three-run homers.
-Outfielders must walk/jog/run the ball back to the infield
on balls in play.
-Allow ex-Pirates General manager David Littlefield to draft
the pitchers for every team.
-The opposing dugout can target the other team's pitcher
with pea-shooters, in-game.
-The whole outfield must shift one position to the left
whenever one or more runners are on base—putting the left fielder in center
field, the center fielder in right field, and the right fielder next to the
hotdog vendor.
-Two players bat at once: a righty and a lefty.